Some brief thoughts about Judd Apatow movies

I'm a big fan of Judd Apatow movies in general and, in the past, was somewhat rankled by accusations of sexism. I understand that some took issue with the fact that the female characters in his movies were little more than ultra hotties to be utilized in the self actualization of goofy looking manchildren but I always took this with a grain of salt. I can't really fault the man for not focusing on the women in his movies. He's writing comedies about goofy stoner dudes and I get the sense that that is what he knows best. If he were to force the inclusion of such women I don't think he could pull it off and the movies on a whole would suffer. When Katherine Heigel turns into a shrill banshee in Knocked Up, some felt this was a sexist portrayal. I felt there was nothing wrong with her being written that way. Some women are shrill banshees the way that some men are Vince Vaughn. However, most times when this criticism is leveled, the main point of contention is that these movies are a sort of wish fulfillment fantasy where these insanely hot women throw themselves at ugly looking fat guys simply because the guys are funny. This is somewhat unrealistic but I never thought much about it.

However, after seeing his most recent movie, Funny People, I had a change of heart to a degree and thought about it in a way I hadn't before. Everyone is asking why these women are interested in these men but to me, that part seems obvious. Women being attracted to men for their personalities or because they are smart or funny is a good thing. The question that I found myself asking after Funny People is: what do these men find in these women? I mean, other than their boobosity and vaginitude? This is no fault of the actresses and certainly says nothing about women in real life, but in these movies the women are generally shallow or shrill or at the very least are simply there to be entertained. Thinking about it this way was what allowed me to really see where people are coming from when they criticize the gender politics in these movies. I tend to notice when, in fiction, I'm asked to believe in a relationship that is no way believable. I also recently saw Away We Go and initially I had this problem then as well. For the first third of the movie it seemed to me as if Maya Rudolph's character had no affection for John Krasinski's character at all. Eventually I was sold on the idea but initially was very jarring.

Taking the basic premise of most of these movies (and when I say Judd Apatow movies I pretty much his entire stable of cohorts as well), there are at least two different angles I'd like to see explored. If we have the fat, schlubby, funny guy and the vapid attractive woman set up we already know what reason the woman has to be interested in the man. Some women are very attracted to funny guys, regardless of if they look like Jonah Hill. I'd like to see an exploration of the man being interested in the woman because she finds him entertaining. I see this in my friends as well, from time to time. Some people have very little need to be entertained by people but a significant need to be entertaining to others. I have known friends who have friends who are their friends only because they laugh at their jokes. This is one reason I could see, theoretically, while the male characters in these movies could be interested in the female characters, other than their supposed ultra hotness.

Closely tied into this is the idea of being interested only because you are not used to any attention at all from the opposite sex. I know that when I was younger I had this problem in full force. My first relationship was 100% ridiculous and was with a girl who couldn't be more wrong for me but I convinced myself it was love because I was overcome with the feeling that came from being appreciated in a romantic sense. Several people I know have also had similar situations. When you are a lonely loser guy growing up the idea of a girl even talking to let alone wanting to drive you to ejacucuming is intoxicating to the extreme. This would also be an interesting angle to take.

And just tangentially, and because I don't feel like organizing this blog post any better, another interesting thing that occurred to me about these movies is that, in these universes, finding love is about giving up something about yourself. The most direct case is in The 40 Year Old Virgin, where Steve Carell suddenly stops liking every single thing he has ever liked, sells all his toys and collectibles and such in order to be with whats her name and open up a business. Seth Rogan moves away from his friends and into a tiny apartment in Knocked Up. Though in that case it's justified somewhat because he is to be a father, it is still suggested it is a positive move and that he is partially doing it because of Katherine Heigel. In Funny People, the main reason why (SPOILARS) Leslie Mann ultimately doesn't take Adam Sandler back is because he's still interested in his career and, most ridiculously, because he's not moved by her daughters high school musical performance. Duh, Leslie Mann, she's not his kid, you damn idiot. In all of these movies, finding a girl is about giving up part of your identity.

An exception is found in Forgetting Sarah Marshall, written by Jason Seigal. This movie subverts the formula as Jason Seigal starts the movie in a relationship with the titular Sarah Marshall who is very much the typical Apatow love interest. As he goes about the business of forgetting her, he finds another girl who is the opposite in that she encourages him to be himself in ways he could not with his ex. She's still not a particularly well developed character but she is at least encouraging and she is not trying to change him fundamentally.

I don't really have anything to say about that and I don't really feel it unrealistic or anything as many people do give up a part of themselves when they enter in to a long term relationship. It does, however, make me wonder what Apatow has given up to be with his wife.