The Lonliness of a Middle Distance Doer

The dinocast site has relaunched for season 2, redesigned, better organized and more attractive. I am excited. And yet... and yet, for personal sanity reasons, I'm going to update the site fortnightly rather than weekly for the foreseeable future.

I do a lot of things. I'm a musician, I'm a writer, an editor and a comics artist. I used to paint. I like good tv, I play video games, read books and comics. I like movies. I have a wife and sort of have friends. I work full time. This is too much, I have decided. The dinocast takes a lot of work each week and it often feels like a struggle to get to it. I like doing it, I am proud of it, but I'm giving up too much for it now. So I'm going to see if it feels better to do it this often rather than spend my nights off hunched over audacity and google image searching gremlins.

It doesn't help that the dinocast is released into the internet void each week and every time it is it creates an echo. How do you find an audience? How do you engage that audience? How do you get people to respond? How do you find people to help you do so? All questions I don't know the answer to.

There Will Be Blood is maybe my favorite movie and there is a scene where the main character, Daniel Plainview, is talking to a man he believes to be his brother. He feels a great relief in doing so because he believes he has found someone with whom he can share his struggle with. Producing a series of podcasts is a far cry from being an insane oil monster, but the following line resonates with me: "If it's in me, it's in you," he says. What's in me that makes me want to *DO* is something I need to find in someone else. I kind of need that connection to continue to spend so much time and energy on something like this. Instead,

I'll be at half mast for a while, see how it goes.